It doesn't matter what time of year it is, or what holiday is coming up - it's always the right time to be thankful and giving in the world around us. But seeing as how Thanksgiving is quickly approaching, I figured this would be the perfect opportunity to talk about giving, and how it's never too early to learn how to do so. (Nor is it ever too late!)
So what does it mean to be giving? It's not just donating your used items to charity. It means sharing with a purpose. Going above and beyond what is expected of you, because you WANT to. It's not just sharing your items with others, it's the sharing of experiences, and feeling better on the inside, knowing you helped make someone's day just a little bit brighter.
Why not be giving? Not only are you helping someone else out in the process, but you help yourself feel better as well, knowing you did a good deed. You may not see the effects of your efforts directly (meaning you may not see the child who receives that toy you donated to Toys For Tots) but you know that somewhere, there's a thankful parent who worried they weren't going to be able to provide a good Christmas for their kid, but you helped ease their burden. You may not see that person keeping warm in the blanket you made, but you know that somewhere your favorite hobby of knitting or crocheting has helped someone out there to stay warm this winter season.
So why is it important to teach children how to be giving from the start? Because from the moment we're born, we're always learning how do live our lives by watching the world around us. We learn by example. Your children are ALWAYS watching what you say and do. This is how they determine what is acceptable and what is not. For example, if you try a food and you think it's disgusting and you spit it out? Chances are that you're not going to be able to get that food anywhere near your kid's mouth. If you think it's gross, they'll already have it in their minds that it's as bad as poison. And if you show them how to treat the new pet cat with gentle strokes? They're going to be loving to that kitty-kitty, even if Mr. Whiskers isn't exactly thrilled about it. Acts of sharing and caring with others are no different. If you treat charity and volunteering as a foreign concept, your kids will too.
For one, it helps to show that that what we have is not who we are. I argued with this idea at first, thinking about how most of the stuff I own, I got because it represents what I'm into, things I love to do, and some items such as gifts mark special moments that happened in my life. But then what if there were a flood and all of my items got destroyed? Would I be less of who I am because my material possessions were gone? No. I'd still be me. I'd be a sad me, and I'd mourn the loss of my items (because to be honest, I am a VERY material person), and then I'd eventually have to move on, but I'd still be me, and those precious moments that were once represented by items I owned would still be as precious to me. (I know this because I've already suffered through one great loss in my lifetime before.) What you own does not define you.
Second, teaching them about giving also helps them look past boundaries. We're all human. We all have to share this world, and we all have basic needs. We need food and water, shelter, and love. Sure, we act tough and pretend that we don't need love. Love is for fools. Love is for the weak. Right? Okay, let's take a step back and look at it this way. Have you ever been in need of something that you couldn't afford it, but then had someone buy it for you or donate it to you? Or maybe just feel bad for you? People do these things out of love. Whether it's them wanting to make themselves feel better by doing something good, or because they honestly care, it was done out of love for one thing or another. As complicated as this world is, it IS simply divided into two main groups. Love and hate.
What's that, you say? Some people never had help, and never had anything handed to them like that? Well then how did they make it so far in life? Surely they had to have someone feed them and care for them when they were infants, right? It may not have been their parents, but there's always someone there who is willing to give a little love, because they know we NEED it. Love is just as essential to our lives as food and water, and shelter. These things may not always be there when we want them to be, but they are indeed things we need. Everyone. We're all human beings, and despite our differences, be it race, color, size, religion, sexual preference - we're all a whole of Mankind, and that is why giving helps children see past the boundaries.
Third, teaching kids to give also helps them to decide for themselves what's worth keeping in life and what they are able to let go of. The items they own can be here one moment and gone in the next, but acts of love and kindness, doing things for others - those are the things that stay with them their whole lives and make them who they are. They should have values, and those values should be in things that cannot be bought with money.
So now that we determined why it's good to teach your children to be thankful, let's discuss how. Giving kind words such as "thank you" or "it means so much" are just the smallest ways to express thanks. I know you may think that it's not a way of giving thanks because you're just using your manners, but do you realize how many people there don't even bother to do that much? How many people there are out there that lack manners? Some people don't bother to be polite, so using manners and having respect for others is just one day to begin.
But using good manners isn't exactly what we're talking about here. Sometimes we need to think on a grander scale, and learn to take that extra step, and give the extra effort. In our town, we often see food drives, coat drives, bake sales, toy drives, school supply collections, fundraisers, penny drives - so much more. There's always someone out there looking to take up collections for the community and for the needy, and always looking for someone to help volunteer.
Maybe offer to help out at a homeless shelter or a food pantry? Organize a drive or a fundraiser of your own. If you can't put a collection event together, maybe just make items to donate to places, like blankets for shelters, or baby hats and mittens for the hospitals. Donate food if you see a food drive. Food drives will also often collect money, in which they'll buy more food. Maybe you're older, and you can help out by donating blood, volunteering to help out at a nursing home, the hospital, or the school?
There's always a way to give, and there should never be any reason to stop you from giving. But whatever you do, make sure to include your children, because you are who they look up to, and you are the person they will learn from. If you don't have kids, maybe be a role model to kids you know. Almost everyone has nieces and nephews, or they have a friend with kids. Invest in our youth. The future is in our hands, but our future is in theirs.
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